“Not me guv, nah not me, I ain’t guilty, I’m innocent mate, honest!” That was close, I just let my imagination run wild and in my head was being arrested for driving with no licence or insurance and in possession of a large quantity of illegal drugs with intent to supply. I’m frightfully glad it was just in my imagination.

There is a television programme which I think is called Police Interceptor, which basically follows police patrol cars finding and chasing wrongdoers. The thing that I find most fascinating about this programme is that whenever any of these people are caught, they never admit to being guilty. The police have to go through a long rigmarole to find who they are, or who owns the stolen goods or illegal drugs and eventually having wasted hours of police time they are finally able to arrest and charge them.

Long gone are the days when a policeman could arrest a criminal by holding up his truncheon, which for the benefit of the younger readers was a small wooden cosh about 6 to 10 inches long and uttering the phrase, “come on sonny Jim, come quietly now.” Upon hearing this phrase and viewing the policeman’s truncheon the hardened criminal would reply, thus. “It’s a fair cop guv, you’ve got me banged to rights.”

Nowadays it takes a three hour police chase, involving seven police cars, from two police forces aided by a police helicopter, the entire thing filmed from the chasing police cars and even when they are eventually caught and arrested, they still won’t admit to being guilty.

Modern life, don’t you just love it? Come back Dixon of Dock Green!


About The Diary of a Country Bumpkin

I am a retired actor, although to be honest I only retired because I wasn't getting any work due to losing my agent when I became a full time carer to my mother who had dementia. and the option of becoming an unemployed actor/waiter at my age was ludicrous, especially as my waiting skills are non-existent. Having said I’m retired, I don’t think there really is such a thing as a retired actor for I am still available for work, I just don’t have an agent or any connections with regards to obtaining any worthwhile work. I have over the years done student films when there is nothing else available, always low paid (if at all) the only incentive was always the promised copy of the finished film for your show reel which nine times out of ten always failed to materialise. I spent many years looking after my aged mother and shortly after her death I was lucky enough to run into an ex-girlfriend of many years ago and our romance blossomed once again, resulting in us getting married in 2013. My move to the countryside inspired me to write The Diary of a Country Bumpkin which tells of my continuing dilemmas in dealing with the rigors of the countryside from the unexpectedly large number of pollens, fungal moulds and hay products waiting to attack the unsuspecting townie. I enjoy writing, see my play Dulce Et Decorum Est Pro Patria Mori on The Wireless Theatre Company, The Plays Wot I Wrote and The Battle of Barking Creek both available on and am very fond of classic cars so my ideal occupation would be acting in a film I had written set in the 1930s/40s, we live in hopes. I am delighted to say that since venturing to the countryside where space is not quite the premium it is in town, I have due to the availability of two double garages acquired more classic cars to form a small collection the pride of which are a 1947 Bentley Mk VI and a 2000 Bentley Arnage. My various blogs and websites are continually evolving and I’m sure that by following the appropriate links you will find something which will edify or amuse. I have written a number of different books all available on Amazon, so don't be shy should you feel the urge to purchase.
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1 Response to Guilty.

  1. Pingback: Favorite Blog Posts for May 2018 – The Haunted Wordsmith

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