Some of you may be familiar with the website Mrs Fox Goes To War which concerns the goings on of a wartime village and is written by the talented Julie Warrington.
One of the characters is an agony aunt called Mrs Hilda Ffinch to whom one may write for advice and guidance the following being the link to her page.
https://www.mrsfoxgoestowar.co.uk/hilda-finch-agony-aunt
This is the second time I have had reason to consult Mrs Ffinch and am posting my communication for your amusement.
Dear Mrs Ffinch,
I have written to you before on my own account but I now find it necessary to communicate on behalf of my close friend and neighbour Mrs Aphelia Butox-Gently who is currently in dispute with a tradesman concerning some shoddy goings on.
My friend Aphelia had been promised a large erection to be placed up her back paddock, and had chosen a particularly strapping builder who looked more than capable of the task, sadly she was to be disappointed.
The erection in question was to be a folly, an extremely tall tower to be placed in her back paddock to the rear of her estate from which she had hoped to view the entire county of Hertfordshire, however the finished folly was to prove to be a very limp affair and not remotely the sort of erection she had hoped for.
Having seen the erection I can confirm that, not only was it considerably shorter than promised but was also bent, much in the fashion of the Leaning Tower of Pisa.
To add insult to injury the young builder then offered to place a clock face on the tower as if to make amends, suggesting “it’s no use having the inclination, if you haven’t got the time.” Whatever that may mean?
I have offered Aphelia the services of my solicitor but as she has nothing in writing as to the size of the promised erection by the young builder I was wondering if it would be folly to continue with this legal action.
I would much appreciate your opinion on this matter as you may be more experienced in this field than I.
I remain, your obedient servant,
James Arbuthnott.
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About The Diary of a Country Bumpkin
I am a retired actor, although to be honest I only retired because I wasn't getting any work due to losing my agent when I became a full time carer to my mother who had dementia. and the option of becoming an unemployed actor/waiter at my age was ludicrous, especially as my waiting skills are non-existent.
Having said I’m retired, I don’t think there really is such a thing as a retired actor for I am still available for work, I just don’t have an agent or any connections with regards to obtaining any worthwhile work.
I have over the years done student films when there is nothing else available, always low paid (if at all) the only incentive was always the promised copy of the finished film for your show reel which nine times out of ten always failed to materialise.
I spent many years looking after my aged mother and shortly after her death I was lucky enough to run into an ex-girlfriend of many years ago and our romance blossomed once again, resulting in us getting married in 2013.
My move to the countryside inspired me to write The Diary of a Country Bumpkin which tells of my continuing dilemmas in dealing with the rigors of the countryside from the unexpectedly large number of pollens, fungal moulds and hay products waiting to attack the unsuspecting townie.
I enjoy writing, see my play Dulce Et Decorum Est Pro Patria Mori on The Wireless Theatre Company, The Plays Wot I Wrote and The Battle of Barking Creek both available on Amazon.co.uk and am very fond of classic cars so my ideal occupation would be acting in a film I had written set in the 1930s/40s, we live in hopes.
I am delighted to say that since venturing to the countryside where space is not quite the premium it is in town, I have due to the availability of two double garages acquired more classic cars to form a small collection the pride of which are a 1947 Bentley Mk VI and a 2000 Bentley Arnage.
My various blogs and websites are continually evolving and I’m sure that by following the appropriate links you will find something which will edify or amuse.
I have written a number of different books all available on Amazon, so don't be shy should you feel the urge to purchase. https://www.amazon.co.uk/Mr-Joe-Wells/e/B06XKWFQHT/ref=dp_byline_cont_book_1
The Diary of a Country Bumpkin 