Donald Trump was seen today rehearsing for his latest farce, “Oops there go my trousers.”
Apparently he said to his assistant; “So I’m coming out of the French doors, stage left, I utter my line, anyone for tennis, then pause for the audience reaction.”
“I shall then walk slowly to centre stage where I have my next line, accompanied by silly grin.”
“Trust me, I can keep this farce going for months, I’m not booked to appear at the Glasgow Empire until June of next year!”
“I shall then exit, stage right to the sound of my own footsteps and that’s only scene one!”
It seems once in the wings he was heard to question how long The Mousetrap had been running suggesting he could do better, although a review in this weeks Stage newspaper said; “More Trump, oh no, God forbid.”
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About The Diary of a Country Bumpkin
I am a retired actor, although to be honest I only retired because I wasn't getting any work and the option of becoming an unemployed actor/waiter at my age was ludicrous, especially as my waiting skills are non-existent.
Having said I’m retired, I don’t think there really is such a thing as a retired actor for I am still available for work, I just don’t have an agent or any connections with regards to obtaining any worthwhile work.
I have over the years done student films when there is nothing else available, always low paid (if at all) the only incentive was always the promised copy of the finished film for your show reel which nine times out of ten always failed to materialise.
I spent many years looking after my aged mother who had dementia, hence the lack of acting work but shortly after her death I was lucky enough to run into an ex-girlfriend of many years ago and our romance blossomed once again, resulting in us getting married in 2013.
My move to the countryside inspired me to write The Diary of a Country Bumpkin which tells of my continuing dilemmas in dealing with the rigors of the countryside from the unexpectedly large number of pollens, fungal moulds and hay products waiting to attack the unsuspecting townie.
I enjoy writing, see my play Dulce Et Decorum Est Pro Patria Mori on The Wireless Theatre Company, The Plays Wot I Wrote and The Battle of Barking Creek both available on Amazon.co.uk and am very fond of classic cars so my ideal occupation would be acting in a film I had written set in the 1930s/40s, we live in hopes.
I am delighted to say that since venturing to the countryside where space is not quite the premium it is in town, I have due to the availability of two double garages acquired more classic cars to form a small collection the pride of which are a 1947 Bentley Mk VI and a 2000 Bentley Arnage.
My various blogs and websites are continually evolving and I’m sure that by following the appropriate links you will find something which will edify or amuse.
The Diary of a Country Bumpkin 
Could someone leave the trap door open?
Good idea.