I occasionally receive friend requests from young ladies on Facebook, most of whom might best be described as not perhaps the most demure of the female species but none the less I’m sure they must have a warm heart as they seem to be reaching out to befriend what they must assume is a lonely old man who would be only too delighted to make contact with them.

According to her profile this latest request comes from a young lady who lives in London in the Untied Kingdom and is from Windsor Colorado, which I believe is in the Americas, sadly I have very few other details of what I assume must be a hectic and fulfilling life as she seems too busy to find time to elaborate on her Facebook page which merely shows the one photo which I have attached below.

I was wondering on what basis we would form this friendship, as she appears to be a visitor to our shores would I perhaps help her with the subtle nuances expressed by other young people in this country who choose to speak with a London Multicultural Accent, which has the rather peculiar way of pronouncing any word ending in ‘ility.’

When I was at school I learnt a smattering of French but in my day we never had a class where they taught us how to understand American, so I imagine there would be some difficulty with verbal communication.

She has however made the effort to send the friend request, so I imagine she must think there is something to be gained from our mutual friendship, although I’m struggling to see what it may be.

I see from her photo that she is squatting in front of a garage door, although she looks as if she has been caught short and is about to relieve herself, I have to admit though I have no idea why she is making the strange hand gestures which I believe are the American version of our V sign.

Looking at the photo I was wondering that perhaps after she has relieved herself she might open the garage door to reveal some wonderful classic cars, a subject dear to my heart about which we might have a long and meaningful discussion but who knows?

Having reviewed all the evidence I am afraid that I am going to have to refuse this young ladies request for friendship as I can see no evidence for a long lasting relationship between the two of us and I do hope she will not be too disappointed.