There has been a bit of a rumpus concerning an announcement on a LNER train recently in which the words, “Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls” was objected to by a non binary passenger.

Now, as an older fellow I was a little confused as to what a non binary person may be, as my only contact previously with the word binary was some vague recollection of a connection with computer stuff and had something to do with 0 (zero) and 1 (one) but this was obviously of no use at all in identifying what a non binary person was, so I reverted to the interweb.

Low and behold there is reams of information on non binary people, unfortunately none of it was any help at all and just seemed to muddy the waters, you can make your own mind up from some of the following.

Just as a bit of a clue, I believe binary is what they describe men and women as, what most of us consider to be the norm by way of describing people of a different sex, so I’m guessing that people who are non binary are neither Arthur nor Martha as the saying goes.

There’s No Such Thing As “Looking Non-Binary”

Most people understand that you don’t have to wear dresses to be a cis woman or wear pants to be a cis man. Yet many people seem to believe you need an androgynous style to be non-binary, creating the assumption that non-binary people who wear women’s clothes must be women.

In an effort to make sense of this I looked up cis and apparently it is someone whose gender identity matches their sex assigned at birth, rather like the vast majority of the population.

Being Non-Binary Doesn’t Mean You Can’t Have Any Other Gender Identity

Some people identity as non-binary and as a man or woman or trans or something else, one can identify as a non-binary woman or man because, this identity acknowledges both that you don’t have an innate identification with any gender and that you’ve been socialized as a woman or a man.

Having more than one gender identity means different things to others, one can identify as both non-binary and a woman to acknowledge that one loves one’s female-coded body but doesn’t always feel it accurately represents you.

Unfortunately there was no description as to what would accurately represent someone in this predicament, so I am unable to add anything which may help you in making any sense of the previous two sentences.

Not All Non-Binary People Go By They/Them Pronouns

Non-binary people can also have a variety of pronouns. Some go by they/them, some go by she/her, some go by both, and some go by more than that. The only way you can know is to ask.

As they say the only way to know is to ask, although I have absolutely no idea what the question might be.

We Are Not All Intersex, Transgender, or Anything Else People Assume We Are

There’s some confusion about what it means to be non-binary. Some equate it with being intersexed, that is, having a body not traditionally classified as male or female but it has nothing to do with your biology.

Intersex people can be non-binary, but so can people who are not intersex. Others equate being non-binary with being transgender for example identifying with a gender other than the one you were assigned at birth. Some non-binary people feel this definition applies to them, but others don’t.

There was reams and reams more but I was beginning to lose the will to live so stopped as I didn’t want to endanger my mental health. As they say, there is some confusion about what it means to be non-binary, which is very much an understatement as far as I can see, so I shall endeavour to sum up.

From what I can gather from all this, you can be male complete with all the gentleman’s paraphernalia or female with all the ladies downstairs bits, transsexual, LGBTQ, unsure if you’re Norris or Doris, in fact virtually anything from a cabbage to a baboon as long as you don’t think of yourself as a man or a woman.

I’m guessing that the percentage of the population who fit this criteria is exceedingly small and yet because one of them has complained about a train announcement using the words, “good afternoon ladies and gentlemen” the vast majority of us will no longer be able to hear those words uttered on a train again, which seems a bit of a shame as I thought it was quite a pleasant way of addressing all the people on the train.

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About The Diary of a Country Bumpkin

I am a retired actor, although to be honest I only retired because I wasn't getting any work due to losing my agent when I became a full time carer to my mother who had dementia. and the option of becoming an unemployed actor/waiter at my age was ludicrous, especially as my waiting skills are non-existent. Having said I’m retired, I don’t think there really is such a thing as a retired actor for I am still available for work, I just don’t have an agent or any connections with regards to obtaining any worthwhile work. I have over the years done student films when there is nothing else available, always low paid (if at all) the only incentive was always the promised copy of the finished film for your show reel which nine times out of ten always failed to materialise. I spent many years looking after my aged mother and shortly after her death I was lucky enough to run into an ex-girlfriend of many years ago and our romance blossomed once again, resulting in us getting married in 2013. My move to the countryside inspired me to write The Diary of a Country Bumpkin which tells of my continuing dilemmas in dealing with the rigors of the countryside from the unexpectedly large number of pollens, fungal moulds and hay products waiting to attack the unsuspecting townie. I enjoy writing, see my play Dulce Et Decorum Est Pro Patria Mori on The Wireless Theatre Company, The Plays Wot I Wrote and The Battle of Barking Creek both available on and am very fond of classic cars so my ideal occupation would be acting in a film I had written set in the 1930s/40s, we live in hopes. I am delighted to say that since venturing to the countryside where space is not quite the premium it is in town, I have due to the availability of two double garages acquired more classic cars to form a small collection the pride of which are a 1947 Bentley Mk VI and a 2000 Bentley Arnage. My various blogs and websites are continually evolving and I’m sure that by following the appropriate links you will find something which will edify or amuse. I have written a number of different books all available on Amazon, so don't be shy should you feel the urge to purchase.
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  1. adguru101 says:

    Oh dear, we have become ridiculously PC about so many things. Let’s be honest: many men are not “gentlemen” and many women aren’t “ladies” either, but what is the harm in being addressed politely? And if one is non-binary, then wouldn’t that person consider “ladies-and-gentlemen” to be an INCLUSIVE term rather than either/or? Head-spinning indeed. Alisa

  2. SueW says:

    I think the person concerned, presumably we are still allowed to use the word person, is a bit of a plank, And the idiots who agreed to this are not far behind and definitely need their heads testing.
    On the other hand, s/he/it has opened up the floodgates for us to have a good old laugh, I’m now trying to think of things that I could deem offensive and complain about, in other words, have a bit of fun trying it on! 😂

  3. Thank you for this, Sir – if you don’t mind me calling you Sir, by which I am assuming a great deal, and I’m sorry if I have offended you in any way whatsoever!

    I have looked for a handy guide for you and, although it is from New Jersey which I understand is in the United States of America, the attached seems to be self explanatory. Please note well that the terms highlighted with an asterisk in bold are considered to be derogatory.

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