I’m a little lost for words having just seen the list for the best jokes at the Edinburgh Fringe, sadly number one on the list has been chosen as the finniest, a joke told by Masai Graham who has apparently won the award before.
All I can say is, if these were the best jokes, I hate to think how awful the worst ones must been.
1. Masai Graham: I tried to steal spaghetti from the shop, but the female guard saw me and I couldn’t get pasta.
2. Mark Simmons: Did you know, if you get pregnant in the Amazon, it’s next-day delivery.
3. Olaf Falafel: My attempts to combine nitrous oxide and Oxo cubes made me a laughing stock.
4. Hannah Fairweather: By my age, my parents had a house and a family, and to be fair to me, so do I – but it is the same house and it is the same family.
5. Will Mars: I hate funerals – I’m not a mourning person.
6. Olaf Falafel: I spent the whole morning building a time machine, so that’s four hours of my life that I’m definitely getting back.
7. Richard Pulsford: I sent a food parcel to my first wife. FedEx.
8. Tim Vine: I used to live hand to mouth. Do you know what changed my life? Cutlery.
9. Sophie Duker: Don’t knock threesomes. Having a threesome is like hiring an intern to do all the jobs you hate.
10. Will Duggan: I can’t even be bothered to be apathetic these days.