Author Archives: The Diary of a Country Bumpkin

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About The Diary of a Country Bumpkin

I am a retired actor, although to be honest I only retired because I wasn't getting any work due to losing my agent when I became a full time carer to my mother who had dementia. and the option of becoming an unemployed actor/waiter at my age was ludicrous, especially as my waiting skills are non-existent. Having said I’m retired, I don’t think there really is such a thing as a retired actor for I am still available for work, I just don’t have an agent or any connections with regards to obtaining any worthwhile work. I have over the years done student films when there is nothing else available, always low paid (if at all) the only incentive was always the promised copy of the finished film for your show reel which nine times out of ten always failed to materialise. I spent many years looking after my aged mother and shortly after her death I was lucky enough to run into an ex-girlfriend of many years ago and our romance blossomed once again, resulting in us getting married in 2013. My move to the countryside inspired me to write The Diary of a Country Bumpkin which tells of my continuing dilemmas in dealing with the rigors of the countryside from the unexpectedly large number of pollens, fungal moulds and hay products waiting to attack the unsuspecting townie. I enjoy writing, see my play Dulce Et Decorum Est Pro Patria Mori on The Wireless Theatre Company, The Plays Wot I Wrote and The Battle of Barking Creek both available on Amazon.co.uk and am very fond of classic cars so my ideal occupation would be acting in a film I had written set in the 1930s/40s, we live in hopes. I am delighted to say that since venturing to the countryside where space is not quite the premium it is in town, I have due to the availability of two double garages acquired more classic cars to form a small collection the pride of which are a 1947 Bentley Mk VI and a 2000 Bentley Arnage. My various blogs and websites are continually evolving and I’m sure that by following the appropriate links you will find something which will edify or amuse. I have written a number of different books all available on Amazon, so don't be shy should you feel the urge to purchase. https://www.amazon.co.uk/Mr-Joe-Wells/e/B06XKWFQHT/ref=dp_byline_cont_book_1

REFUSING TO PAY AFFINITY WATER.

Very soon I am going to have to pay the ridiculously expensive water bill from Affinity Water for £821.43 for the year, bearing in mind, we live in the countryside and are on a septic tank so this bill from … Continue reading

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FRANCE ISSUES SURVIVAL GUIDE IN CASE OF RUSSIAN INVASION.

I HAVE SEEN THE CONTENTS OF THE GUIDE AND IT SEEMS THE INSTRUCTIONS ARE BASICALLY, TO EAT CHEESE AND SURRENDER, ALTHOUGH I DOUBT WE COULD DO MUCH BETTER.

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MASSIVE JET FUEL FIRE, AFTER SHIP COLLISION IN THE NORTH SEA.

The container ship Solong has collided with the enormous oil tanker Stena Immaculate which was stationary in the North Sea and at anchor at the time with a cargo of 220,000 barrels of jet fuel on board, causing a massive … Continue reading

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PRO PALESTINIAN PROTESTER CLIMBS THE ELIZABETH TOWER IN LONDON.

A pro-Palestinian protester climbed the Elizabeth Tower in London at the weekend in a major security breach staying perched on the building for some many hours whilst negotiators attempted to encourage him to come down. Yet, another example of one … Continue reading

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MODERN USE OF THE WORD ‘SLUG.’

I must preface this post with the following trigger warning; This post contains an image of a slug, which is a particularly unattractive garden pest but I rather suspect a vast number of young people who have never ventured into … Continue reading

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THE TRAGIC ENDING FOR UKRAINE.

With all the nonsense that has been going on with Mr Trump recently, I just wanted to step back for a moment and reassess the events of the last few years in an attempt to put them into some sort … Continue reading

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BBC QUIETLY DROPS ALL EPISODES OF ‘SCANDALOUS’ NEW THRILLER ON iPLAYER.

I still speak normal English, so when I saw this, I was under the impression that the programme had been dropped, as that is exactly what this says. However, up until fairly recently when a programme was dropped it used … Continue reading

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LATEST NEWS FROM AMERICA.

A shocked world yesterday listened in horror as Mr Trump conceded defeat to the Russians, saying ‘you may think this makes me look like a weak and defeated man, but I have to say this is far from the truth, … Continue reading

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PRESIDENT VOLODYMYR ZELENSKY.

VERY SAD, THERE IS NOTHING FURTHER TO ADD.

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TRAGIC SHARK DEATHS.

Now I’m no expert on these matters but, there has to be some sort of correlation between going in the water and being eaten by a shark.

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