SAME HOTEL DIFFERENT REVUE.

We went at the weekend for one of our 40’s events at The Midland Hotel in Morecambe which is a fabulous Art Deco hotel and is not the cheapest hotel in the world but the service and ambience etc were well worth paying for, however the hotel in now under new management and some of the changes which have been implemented by the new owners didn’t go down too well with our group.

The following are two revues, one being mine and the other being from a complete stranger who stayed at the hotel with a completely different view as to the merits of the place. I shall leave my thoughts at the end of this post and will upload some of our photos later, when I get a chance.

The following is my revue.

We stayed at The Midland on the weekend of 01/04 March 2024 where we enjoyed our 30’s/40’s weekend with Mark and Hoc Ewing and I have to say all aspects of the weekend which they had control over were up to their usual standard.

Unfortunately, other aspects of our stay were definitely not up to par and the feel of the place had been spoilt, which is a great shame for one of the best Art Deco Hotels in this country.

Having to collect a table number and go to the bar to order food is not what one expects from a four star hotel, especially when paying four star prices for the food, this is after all the sort of service one might receive when eating at a down market pub/restaurant establishment.

Having previously stayed at The Midland on numerous occasions we were very aware of the lack of staff which tended to put a bit of a dampener on our Saturday evening entertainment especially. On previous events when the band had finished, we would all retire to the bar and continue our drinking and socialising for some time and one would have thought the takings in the bar would have been more than enough to justify the staff cost to cover this service. Regardless of the fact that we were taking part in a special event, it is not de rigueur to close the bar at 11.00pm to residents of a four star hotel.

Personally, there are two more 40’s events taking place in Morecambe later this year where we would have normally stayed at The Midland but if this is the standard of service, we are going to receive we may have to look for alternative accommodation which would be a shame as in previous years, to stay at The Midland has been a delight.

Please do not spoil the ship for a ha’peth of tar.

And now for a rather different revue of the same hotel.

I visited for a 2 night stay, during my stay I found all staff very attentive, professional and welcoming.
The room and establishment was spotless throughout.
At busy times staff remained calm and efficient.
Table service is present at breakfast, however you do order at the bar on an evening.
I feel the times of table cloths and service have moved on, ordering at the bar creates a more friendly, relaxed atmosphere, hospitality staff have a very difficult job, they are not servants and should not be treated as such.
The warm, welcome, friendly, family service is what Morecambe needs to bring families back to the holiday destination it once was
Thank you to all the staff at the Midland.
You are all superb.

Now, call me a sceptical old so and so, but this second revue seems to me to have the feel of something a management team might have put up in an effort to encourage others to embrace the “Bernie Inn” style of dining.

I was also slightly amused by the comment that hospitality staff have a very difficult job and they are not servants and should not be treated as such. Whilst not wishing to be too picky about their comment, I would have thought the job description of someone who waits at table must contain reference to serving food, now whether one who serves is a servant is obviously open to debate and no doubt will be fiercely debated when I have posted this and the more woke readers have read this post.

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SADIQ KHAN 25 POINTS AHEAD TO WIN LONDON MAYOR. OH DEAR OH DEAR!

How can this be, he has made the place one of the most unfriendly and expensive places to own a motor car, where you have to pay to park in the road where you live and with all his bus lanes and bicycle lanes has left very little space for drivers to actually drive the damn things when they do leave home.

Should you be brave or foolish enough to venture forth in your car there is the added hazard of the ridiculous 20 mph speed limit and its associated speed cameras, let alone the problem of finding somewhere to park when you get to the end of your journey due to the multitude of double yellow lines which have been added over the years.

Now he seems to be making a pigs ear of Policing in London too, all I can say is I’m bloody glad I don’t live there anymore!

I make a point of avoiding London like the plague, which is a shame as I used to enjoy going there, however it is a bonus for the other towns and cities which I visit and spend my money.

Susan Hall has said she will abolish the ULEZ should she get elected and I say good luck to her, although I’m not holding my breath waiting on her winning and in the meantime, I’m off to Morecambe for the weekend which is a lot more fun than London.

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SEE YOU AT SYWELL.

I am a little late posting these photos of our trip at the weekend to the rather lovely See you at Sywell event which took place at the Art Deco Aviator hotel at Sywell aerodrome. Very good!

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WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF WORLD WAR THREE BROKE OUT.

There has of late been some speculation in the press of late as to what would happen if World War Three were to break out with apparently over thirty percent of the youth of today not willing to volunteer or fight if called up.

This is a rather worrying statistic as I feel the shortfall would then have to be made up by people of advanced years like myself who might be more suited to the likes of Dad’s Army, however if they need men to sacrifice themselves in a futile gesture I’m sure the older generation would be only too willing to step up to the plate.

I have to say this trend to be more “woke” in all aspects of life is not a modern phenomenon as can be heard in Noel Cowerd’s song of the 1950’s; what’s going to happen to the tots which you may find moderately amusing.

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POLICE INVESTIGATING A VIRTUAL RAPE IN THE METAVERSE.

I was somewhat surprised when I read of this story which reported that the Police are investigating the first case of rape in the metaverse after a girl under the age of 16 whose digital character was raped by a gang of online strangers.

Whilst trying not to be too controversial I have to state that I wonder why anyone would want to venture into the pretend world of avatars in the first place let alone stay there long enough to be gang raped when presumably one could leave at any moment by switching off and removing the headset.

The Police stated that the victim had suffered no injuries as there was no physical attack, which I rather thought was stating the bleeding obvious but said she had suffered the same emotional and psychological trauma as if she had been raped in the real world.

Hardly surprisingly, this is the first time Police have investigated a virtual sexual offence which leaves me wondering how long will it be before we hear the Police are investigating a crime of murder in the virtual world as I know from experience of watching my grandchildren that it is quite common for there to be absolute carnage in some of these virtual games with dead bodies strewn about all over the place.

In similar vein I see that the British Film Institute in London has placed trigger warnings on a number of James Bond films in their current season, stating that they contain language, images or other content that reflect views prevalent in its time, but will cause offence today (as they did then). I have to wonder if the statement in brackets (as they did then) was added by the writer of the article as I have no recollection there being an outcry at the time of the films release.

One would have thought that an audience who would be going to the British Film Institute would be sophisticated enough to have some idea of what a James Bond film might contain, or at the very least have the intelligence to research the film for themselves without the need of trigger warnings from the Institute.

Rather sadly I’m surprised to find a 2021 survey conducted by the British Board of Film Classification found that almost two-thirds of teenagers polled supported trigger warnings on films which might negatively affect their mental health.

The research showed that anxiety (50%), stress (38%) and depression (34%) were the key issues of concern for the 13-18-year-olds, followed by body image issues (30%), suicide (20%) and self-harm (20%).

Now, I’m no mathematician but if you add all these issues together it comes to 192% so I assume vast numbers of the youth of today must suffer with two of these conditions which I have to say seems exceedingly sad when I compare it to my youth and the joy and excitement we had growing up.

Rather like today it was a time when everything was new and ground-breaking from fashion to music to technological inventions. Unlike today especially with fashion and music, Britain was at the forefront, the Beatles ruled the world, Carnaby Street was an Underground tube trip away with all the modern fashion at our fingertips.

The first man took a rocket ship to space, a satellite went up too and we watched on television as the first rather crackly television picture was sent by it, then later men on the moon and the discovery which debunked the nursery rhyme that it wasn’t made of cheese.

Then getting our first job, a motorcar and freedom of the road, the first wage packet at the end of the week in a small brown envelope, the chance to learn how to budget for once the contents of the small brown envelope were gone there was no more money until next week, it was not common practice to visit the bank of mum and dad as is the case nowadays.

We had the ability to be punctual due to the lack of a mobile phone, so if we were meeting our friends to go to the pictures (cinema) we didn’t have the chance to phone to say we were going to be late, so should you turn up at the meeting place and your friends were gone you would have no idea which cinema they were in, was it the flea pit or did they plump for the Majestic? A very good lesson in punctuality here.

Another major advantage we had and this will seem strange to modern youth was not having the internet, we learnt of fashion and music from a weekly magazine aimed at teenagers, for anything else we had documentaries and pop programmes on the television or the local library for serious research. We were not exposed to whatever the youth of today are exposed to that make them full of anxiety about so many things, we may have at some time become involved in a fracas with another youth but it would generally have only involved fisticuffs, this was not a time when vast swathes of young men went about carrying a machete down their tracksuit trousers, nor were girls in danger of being drugged and date raped after leaving a night club.

Sadly, I can see where a lot of the anxieties of the young people of today come from but I have to say, that being the question, with all the real dangers they are exposed to why on earth would you enter into a virtual world where far worse things could happen?

Lastly, should any young person happen across this post, (unlikely as it is) please heed this advice, enjoy the real world, I’m sure there are more than enough things to amuse yourself contained within it and this may seem obvious but it seems not to some; should you venture forth in the virtual metaverse and you are feeling anxious or afraid, remember it is not the real world you do not have to stay there, please take off your headset and turn off the machine.

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HAPPY NEW YEAR.

I DON’T KNOW ABOUT FINISHED WITH 2023, I HAVE TO SAY I ENJOYED EVERY MINUTE OF IT AND WOULD LIKE TO WISH ALL OUR FRIENDS A HAPPY NEW YEAR AND LOOK FORWARD TO SEEING THEM AGAIN NEXT YEAR WHEN WE CAN DO IT ALL AGAIN!

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SIR ALEC GUINESS, FAIRY TALE RUBBISH.

I came across this on Facebook and I have to say Sir Alec Guiness has summed up my feelings about so many of the modern films made today which unfortunately seem to be favoured by the young and the mass market audience.

Harry Potter, Game of Thrones and so many more just leave me losing the will to live and wondering what on earth anyone sees in them, sadly I think I am in the minority in this respect.

Christmas Day and the young people have taken command of the television in the lounge and my wife is watching Japanese versions of fairy stories while she is cooking in the kitchen, so not wishing to appear too anti-social and retire to the bedroom searching the tv for a decent black and white World War two film, I am left with Facebook as a means of retaining my sanity.

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TEACHERS TOLD NOT TO USE PUPILS CHOSEN PRONOUNS.

Under new government guidance on how best to support transgender students, teachers in England have been told they do not have to address pupils in their chosen pronouns.

Unfortunately the current crop of teachers who seem to be a little bit “woke” on these matters may have to take a leaf out of the previous generation of teachers, some of whom could have been described as a tad sadistic when it came to dishing out punishment, although speaking personally the cane may sound a little harsh to modern ears but it certainly helped to enforce discipline without a shadow of a doubt.

I can imagine the scene where little Johnny decides he wishes to be addressed as “she” and is taken off to the headmasters study for six of the best and is seen emerging later with a slight tear in his eye expressing a desire to join the Royal Marines.

I know this treatment may seem a little harsh to modern folk but the advantage of this practice would be as a delaying tactic whereby the young students could take some time to reflect on their rather fashionable desire to change sex until they have matured sufficiently to really know who or what they are.

As for those of them who still have the desire to transition into a cat at the ripe old age of eighteen I imagine defecating into a litter tray for a week or two could be used as a means of concentrating the mind as to their chosen lifestyle.

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LADY REFEREE CAUSES A BIT OF A STIR.

Apparently, there is a bit of a stir going on as Rebecca Welch is set to become the first woman referee to take charge of a men’s FA Cup third-round tie and having seen a photograph of her in her shirt I suddenly thought they could make a song about her as they like to do for football events. Unfortunately, I know absolutely nothing about football so I managed the first two lines but after that I’m a little stumped, perhaps some of you might be able to help.

TWO PENS ON MY SHIRT,

JULES RIMET STILL GLEAMING

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A MAN WENT INTO A PUB………

I saw this on Facebook and thought it was a good tale, so I borrowed it and added a photo for added atmosphere.

Paddy had been drinking at his local Dublin pub all day and most of the night celebrating Ireland’s draw with Germany.

Mick, the bartender, says “You’ll not be drinking anymore tonight, Paddy”

Paddy replied “OK Mick, I’ll be on my way then.” Paddy spins around on his stool and steps off. He falls flat on his face.

“Shoite” he says and pulls himself up by the stool and dusts himself off. He takes a step towards the door and falls flat on his face. “Shoite, Shoite!”

He looks to the doorway and thinks to himself that if he can just get to the door and some fresh air he’ll be fine. He belly crawls to the door and shimmies up to the door frame.

He sticks his head outside and takes a deep breath of fresh air, feels much better and takes a step out onto the sidewalk. He falls flat on his face. “Bi’Jesus… I’m fockin’ focked,” he says.

He can see his house just a few doors down, and crawled to the door and shimmies up the door frame, opens the door and shimmies inside.

He takes a look up the stairs and says “No fockin’ way”. He crawls up the stairs to his bedroom door and says “I can make it to the bed.” He takes a step into the room and falls flat on his face. He says “Fock it” and falls into bed.

The next morning, his wife, Mary, comes into the room carrying a cup of tea and says, “Get up Paddy. Did you have a bit to drink last night?”. Paddy says, “I did Mary. I was fockin’ pissed. But how’d you know?”

She said “Mick called. You left your wheelchair at the pub again.”

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